Quick Hits and a Rittle Bit o' Ribrary

Everyone needs a little more Ribrary Courts in their life, and since I get some every day, I figured it would be appropriate to lead off today’s post with a small update on the fortune of my fine building. First off, big news in the bottled soft drinks arena. Everyone in the complex has been very depressed lately because of the departure of the vending machine that would give you 4 sodas and your money back. Never fear though, Ceejay is here! Last week brought the triumphant return of the Ribrary Courts vending machine, but now it’s a brand spanking new Pepsi machine. It is filled with the usual Pepsi, Diet Pepsi and Sierra Mist, but this contraption also has a Lipton Green Tea selection. How very hippy of them. But of course it hasn’t been stocked yet so we can’t determine the degree of hilarity that will ensue. At least it has a sticker that reads: “This machine takes new $1 presidential coins!”. Finally! I’ve been looking for a place to get rid of all my presidential $1 coins…

In other Ribrary reports, there was a printed notice posted in the elevator alerting tenants to sidewalk construction that was to occur this past weekend. Somehow the dates had been mistaken, but instead of printing a new bulletin, someone had gone in and changed the date with white out and a pen. You stay classy Mr. Courts.

I don’t have anything to say about UVA’s massacre at the hands of Duke on the college hardwood, other than to update an original Oceanliner feature. For those of you following along at home, we are tracking whether or not Ryan “Tree Trunks” Pettinella can go an entire season with more fouls than points. Well, I’m happy to report than after a stellar 9 point, 4 foul effort against the Blue Devils (in only 18 minutes I might add), everyone’s favorite immobile center is dead even for the season with 24 points and 24 fouls! UVA’s season may fizzle down the stretch, but Pettinella’s road to glory will keep me hooked until the very end. To maintain his dignity, Ryan will have to avoid performances like the Hartford game, where he had 2 fouls and 0 of everything else in only 2 minutes of action. Conference play may be a bit tougher on the big man…

Peter King is a horrible football writer. For being a person that is paid to write about the NFL for a living, for freakin Sports Illustrated no less, he is unbelievably bad. Besides busting his load over Brett Favre week after week, he continually bombards readers week after week with horrible gimmicks. Earlier in the season he tried to rank the top 500 overall players in football. What a cop out for a column and an exercise in futility. And now it gets comical. Every week in his Monday Morning QB column on SI.com, King ranks “The Fine Fifteen”, his unabashedly biased ranking of the best 15 teams in the league. And for some unknown reason, he has continued these Fine Fifteen rankings deep into the playoffs, even when there were only 8 and 4 teams left in the bracket! What a loser. Let me waste both mine and my reader’s time by arbitrarily ranking teams that won’t play another football game for 9 months, instead of actually analyzing games that just happened or preview the upcoming Conference Title Games and Super Bowl. So frustrating some times.

If you want good NFL analysis however, may I point you towards Gregg Easterbrook and his Tuesday Morning Quarterback column on the Page 2 section of ESPN.com. In typical Oceanliner punctuality, I now realize I am pointing this out with only 3 games left in the whole stinkin playoffs. But for the rest of the way, and in years to come, Easterbrook is as logical and insightful as they come when breaking down the past week of NFL games. Here is where you can find his archive, and look for a recap column Tuesday early afternoon.

In other Page 2 news, DJ Gallo now writes 1-2 columns per week for this ESPN section, a well as a new Sports Pickle every week. For those of you like me who love his sarcastic and seemingly out of nowhere zingers, this is a welcome addition to any holster of anticipated weekly-read columns.

In a bit of humble NFL analysis myself, the Chargers GM is the reason San Diego beat Indianapolis on Sunday. The fact that LT might get injured, like he did Sunday, is exactly why General Manager AJ Smith has one of the best backups in the league in Michael Turner. This is a guy who has averaged 5.5 yards a carry in 4 years backing up Tomlinson. Smith re-signed Turner before this season to a 1-year deal for $2.35 million. That is starter’s money for a backup to the best back in the league. Everyone thought this was crazy. But shit, Turner’s 71 HUGE second half yards is one of the main reasons San Diego is now in the AFC title game and not sitting at home back in Cali for the off season. Smith also drafted lighting quick Darren Sproles as the team’s 3rd RB and return specialist. Besides having 2 special teams TD’s in the regular season against the Colts, Sproles took a screen pass 56 yards for 6 in the rematch on Sunday in about .2 seconds. Dude is Noel Devine fast. Smith also signed Antonio Gates as an undrafted free agent. Smith also orchestrated the 2004 Draft day trade with the G-Men the sent away Elisha Manning but got them Phil Rivers (competitive as hell), plus the Giants picks that they used on Shawne Merriman and kicker Nate Kaeding. Smith also drafted Luis Castillo, Antonio Cromartie and Eric Weddle (he of the sick interception). Smith also traded for wideout Chris Chambers midseason (67 yards and a touchdown vs. Indy, 121 yards vs. Tennessee). Dude is a talent uber freak and a goddamn genius. He even got a backup like Billy Volek to look good. I bet the Titans missed Billy the Kid when they had to resort to Kerry “Homeless Man-Psychopath-Al Borland” Collins this year. It makes you wonder how some GM’s can mess up so bad and keep their jobs. AJ Smith, The Oceanliner salutes you.

Well, that’s it for today folks. The Oceanliner had a helluva time this weekend, sake bombing on Friday night and wine tasting all day Saturday. Many thanks to the roommate coalition of Meg-Christina-Eileen-Emily for organizing that one, as Austin, Schling, Tori and Beercan all came along for the ride. Funniest part of the afternoon were the two wineries less than a mile apart, one called Lost Creek and the other Hidden Brook. Talk about completely ripping a name off your neighbor. This led to many jokes about a third wine being created called Invisible Stream or Concealed Tributary. Good times.

Just another heads up that apartment 310 at Ribrary Courts will be throwing a Super Bowl party on February 3rd. We can officially announce that deer chili will be served now, along with copious amounts of alcohol. Everyone that can make it should stop on by. Until then, stay safe, keep it real and put your mittens on.