Ribrary Courts

Some people live in normal apartment complexes with competent managers, friendly staff and efficient facilities. Then there is the one I live in, which is the exact opposite. The building is actually very nice (built in 2002) and when my roommate Schling and I were looking for places to live it looked like all of the other way-to-expensive Arlington high rises that would have slutted us for a grand a month or more. So when we walked into the ill fated lobby of Library Courts apartments and the friendly leasing manager named Tracy informed us we would be paying $600 a month (which included all utilities except cable and Internet, a washer-dryer and cheap parking) we immediately thought it was too good to be true. We were absolutely right, and now its our home.

We should have noticed that something was awry when Tracy handed us a business card that had someone else’s name crossed out and hers written above it. Some would argue we should have walked out right away. But instead, we of course signed the lease, gave her a check for $1800 for the first months rent and went on our merry way. Things got very sketchy very quickly, well, at least much sketchier than they already were. We gave her the check the first week of June and she said it wouldn’t be cashed until the first week of July, when we were scheduled to move in. So of course, two weeks later, I get a message from Schling telling me that our favorite Vietnamese leasing agent Tracy Tran had cashed the check and 3 of Schling’s other checks had bounced. This was not good. I could just see Tracy Tran gallivanting through the streets of Bangkok sipping Muy Thais and munching on rice patties courtesy two American dumbasses.

So we call Library Courts back and they inform us that Tracy Tran no longer works for them. She had lasted all of six weeks, yet somehow had managed to book us into a very nice apartment. We are almost positive she jumped us ahead of a huge waiting list too, because after we moved in Schling heard the new leasing agent (a Sri Lankan named Ceejay) telling potential residents that there was a 30 person waiting list for an apartment. So it turns out that Tracy Tran whored a bunch of other innocent people instead of us, and I’ll take any day. I hope Tracy is doing well at her next incompetent job, wherever it may be.

Everything is actually working out very well. We are in a great location, close to the metro and the apartment is pretty nice. There are a few amusing side notes though that makes the place feel like home, albeit a very sketchy home.

Exhibit A: The Lobby
We live in Arlington. The person that designed our lobby must have thought we rode llamas to work and lived in Southeast Asia. There is a table that has wooden elephants as its base. There is some kind of Sanskrit mural right as you walk in.
And let’s not forget the giant vases that flank the main doorway. Frank Lloyd Wright’s Asian cousin must have had a say in raying out the aura and décor of Ribrary Courts.

Exhibit B: The “Workout Room”
It’s never good when the workout room in your building has a sign posted that its maximum occupancy is 6 people.
You can comfortably fit 8 people in a Yukon and this room can only hold 6 people? Copernicus’ retarded cousin must have done the calculations on that.


Exhibit C: The "Mail Room"
Since the hardworking Sri Lankan leasing agent Ceejay only works 9-5, if a package comes to the building, it is simply placed on a communal shelf next to the mailboxes and is basically up for grabs.
This is actually a little concerning because I saw someone’s check order just lying there. Only in Ribrary Courts.






Exhibit D: The Vending Machine
This one is my favorite. My roommate Schling went down to the parking garage to get a soda from the vending machine to mix drinks with. He came back with two Gingerales and 20 nickels. Apparently when he put his dollar in and hit the Canada Dry button, it shot out two bottles of soda and all of his money back. In nickels.

So go the adventures of Library Courts. Stay tuned.